Thursday, December 17, 2009

A Parents Night Before Christmas

A Parents Night Before Christmas

'Twas the night before Christmas
when all through the house
I searched for the tools
to hand to my spouse

Instructions were studied
and we were inspired,
in hopes we could manage
"Some Assembly Required."

The children were quiet (not asleep) in their beds,
while Dad and I faced the evening with dread:
a kitchen, two bikes, Barbie's town house to boot!
And, thanks to Grandpa, a train with a toot!

We opened the boxes,
my heart skipped a beat
- let no parts be missing
or parts incomplete!

"Too late for last-minute returns or replacement;
if we can't get it right, it goes in the basement!
When what to my worrying eyes should appear
but 50 sheets of directions, concise, but not clear.

With each part numbered and every slot named,
so if we failed, only we could be blamed.
More rapid than eagles the parts then fell out,
all over the carpet they were scattered about.

"Now bolt it! Now twist it! Attach it right there!
Slide on the seats, and staple the stair!
Hammer the shelves, and nail to the stand."
"Honey," said hubby, "you just glued my hand."

And then in a twinkling, I knew for a fact
that all the toy dealers had indeed made a pact
to keep parents busy all Christmas Eve night
with "assembly required" till morning's first light

We spoke not a word, but kept bent at our work,
till our eyes, they went bleary; our fingers all hurt.
The coffee went cold and the night, it wore thin
before we attached the last rod and last pin.

Then laying the tools away in the chest,
we fell into bed for a well-deserved rest.
But I said to my husband just before I passed out,
"This will be the best Christmas, without any doubt.

Tomorrow we'll cheer, let the holiday ring,
and not have to run to the store for a thing!
We did it! We did it! The toys are all set
for the perfect, most perfect, Christmas, I bet!"

Then off to dreamland and sweet repose
I gratefull went, though I suppose
there's something to say for those self-deluded-
I'd forgotten that BATTERIES are never included!
(Author Unknown)

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Barbie & Bratz Holiday Promotion!!!

Don't Miss This Happening Holiday Promotion!

Get your order in my Dec. 21st for it to arrive in time for Christmas!

Purchase one or more Bratz dolls & choose another Bratz doll of equal or lesser value for FREE!

Purchase one or more Barbie Accessories lot & receive a FREE Barbie with your order!

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Last Minute Gift Ideas

Find more items like these in My Book Barn

Find a wide variety of last minute gift ideas in My Book Barn!

The Night Before Christmas For Moms

I stumbled across this on the web & thought it was cute so I wanted to share it wit everyone.

It was the night before Christmas, when all thru the abode
Only one creature was stirring, and she was cleaning the commode.
The children were finally sleeping, all snug in their beds,
While visions of Nintendo 64 and Barbie, flipped through their heads.

The dad was snoring in front of the TV,
With a half-constructed bicycle on his knee.
So only the mom heard the reindeer hooves clatter,
Which made her sigh, "Now what's the matter?"

With toilet bowl brush still clutched in her hand,
She descended the stairs, and saw the old man.
He was covered with ashes and soot, which fell with a shrug.
"Oh great," muttered the mom, "Now I have to clean the rug."

"Ho-ho-ho!" cried Santa, "I'm glad you're awake."
"Your gift was especially difficult to make."
"Thanks, Santa, but all I want is some time alone."
"Exactly!" he chuckled, "I've made you a clone."

"A clone?" she asked, "What good is that?
Run along, Santa, I've no time for chit-chat."
The mother's twin. Same hair, same eyes,
Same double chin.

"She'll cook, she'll dust," She'll mop every mess.
You'll relax, take it easy, Watch The Young & the Restless." "Fantastic!" the mom cheered. "My dream come true!
"I'll shop. I'll read., I'll sleep a whole night through! "

From the room above, the youngest began to fret.
"Mommy?! I scared... and I am wet."
The clone replied, "I'm coming, sweetheart."
"Hey," the mom smiled, "She knows her part."

The clone changed the small one, and hummed a tune,
as she bundled the child, in a blanket cocoon.
"You the best mommy ever. " I really love you."
The clone smiled and sighed, "I love you, too."

child The mom frowned and said, "Sorry, Santa, no deal. "
That's my child's love, she's trying to steal."
Smiling wisely Santa said, "To me it is clear, "
Only one loving mother, is needed here."

The mom kissed her child, and tucked her into bed.
"Thank you, Santa, for clearing my head.
I sometimes forget, it won't be very long,
When they'll be too old, for my cradle-song."

The clock on the mantle began to chime.
Santa whispered to the clone, "It works every time."
With the clone by his side Santa said, "Goodnight. Merry Christmas, Mom, You'll be all right."

(Author Unknown)

Monday, December 7, 2009

Sleepers by Lorenzo Carcaterra Book Review

Sleepers Sleepers by Lorenzo Carcaterra

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
I loved this book! Of course it was so much better than the movie (which I also love). Well written & fast paced I couldn't wait to turn the page. Both humorous & heart wrenching I highly recommend this book to anyone who enjoyed the movie.

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I have a copy of this book in My Book Barn!

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Firefly Cloak-A Novel by Sheri Reynolds

Firefly Cloak: A Novel Firefly Cloak: A Novel by Sheri Reynolds

My rating: 4 of 5 stars
I thought this was a good read. Entertaining & funny at times with some more serious parts intertwined. I gave this book 4 stars only because I did not care for the ending. I felt there was too many things left unsaid.

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Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Bingo by Rita Mae Brown (Book Review)

Bingo Bingo by Rita Mae Brown

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
One of the better books I have read of the Runnymede series. Funny, entertaining & q quick read. I highly recommend this series to anyone who likes books with southern setting & eccentric, quirky characters! This one is sure to make you laugh out loud!

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Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Ultra Violet by Nancy Bush (Reading Now)

Ultraviolet (Jane Kelly Mysteries) Ultraviolet by Nancy Bush

View all my reviews >>

The Prince Of Tides by Pat Conroy (Review)

The Prince of Tides The Prince of Tides by Pat Conroy

My rating: 4 of 5 stars
After reading & loving The Water Is Wide I couldn't wait to read this book. Though it was a good read with interesting characters & plot I found some of Conroy's descriptions/explanations a bit too long. Conroy is known for his great descriptions & making the reader feel as if they are actually in the scene but some in this book I think would have been better off shortening them a bit. Overall I did enjoy this books & it's characters. I would recommend it to anyone who likes books that take place in the south or on the beach. It also has that quirky southern character feel to it as well.

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Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Children Of The Dust by Clancy Carlile

Children of the Dust Children of the Dust by Clancy Carlile

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
I did not want this book to end! I could not wait to read another of Carlile's books after reading Honkytonk Man & though I consider Honkytonk Man to be one of my favorite books I believe this may be even better!

I found it to be very well written with interesting & intriguing characters. I did not want to put this book down & could not wait to get to the next page to see what happened next. Taking place in Oklahoma during the Land Rush it was very interesting to read a little of the history behind that along with the intriguing storyline. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is interested in history or just likes a good western type story!

I definitely look forward to reading more of Clancy Carlile's books!

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Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Christmas Is Coming...

Christmas is coming! Need some gift ideas for that special cook in your life!? Find them here!

Good Food Fast Food & Wine Magazines Menu Cookbook Anne Walsh Hardback

Santa's Favorite Cookies Cookbook Recipes Brand New

Favorite Brand Name Ragu Family Favorites Cookbook Hardback Recipe Book

The Best Of Food & Wine Hardback Cookbook Recipe Book 1984

Favorite Brand Name Celebrate Kraft Cool Whip Cookbook Hardback Brand New

Monday, October 5, 2009

A few of my favorite books

I'm a huge bookworm & love reading many different genres of books. Reading is my escape from reality however brief it may be. I always take a book with me to any appointments I have as to not go crazy while waiting. If I'm at home & sitting down it's a pretty safe bet I have a book in hand. That is unless I'm on here & even then a lot of times I am looking for "new authors/books" just waiting for me to discover. Based on the books & authors I have posted if you have any books and or authors you think I might enjoy reading feel free to share them! I would love to hear any suggestions!

As my "to be read" books pile to the ceiling time however does not. There is just not enough time in the day! Anyways, my "to be read" book pile is a whole other blog! For now I'm going to post my all time favorite books. O.k....well, SOME of my all time favorite books. It's so hard to pick just a few!

How I Left the Great State of Tennessee & Went On To Better Things by Joe Jackson
Water For Elephants by Sara GruenHonkytonk Man by Clancy Carlile
The Bearded Lady by Sharlee Dieguez

The Water Is Wide by Pat Conroy
Fried Green Tomatoes At the Whistle Stop Cafe by Fannie Flagg
The Water Is Wide by Pat Conroy
A Prayer For Owen Meany by John Irving

The Rad Hat Club(Series) by Haywood Smith
Plum Series by Janet Evanovich
A Widow For One Year by John Irving
Cold Sassy Tree by Olive Ann Burns

The Body Farm (Scarpetta Series) by Patricia CornwellShutter Island by Dennis Lehane
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest by Ken Kesey
Midnight In the Garden Of Good & Evil by John Berendt

Elephants In the Living Room, Bears In the Canoe by Elizabeth Levy, Liz Hammond
Mad Girls In Love (Series) by Michael Lee West
Offspring & Off Season by Jack Ketchum
The Beast House (Series) by Richard Laymon

Angels Flight (Bosch Series) by Michael Connelly
Candy Apple Red (Jane Kelly Series) by Nancy Bush
Six of One (Runnymede Series) by Rita Mae Brown

The Manhattan Hunt Club by John Saul

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Growing Up In the 80's

As a child growing up in the 80's this is what I remember...

Playing video games like Centipede & Pac Man on the Atari.
Spending hours playing Mario Brothers, Paper Boy, Zelda & many other games on my Nintendo I got for Christmas after it came out.

Of course before that I was playing with dolls...

My talking Alf doll that yes I still have. You placed a cassette in his back & he told stories. Very cool!
Loved my Care Bear! I still have him too! I had Bedtime Bear which was blue with a moon on his tummy & star hanging from it.
Yep! I've still got Chubbles too! He was cool! Turn the lights on & his eyes & nose flickered & he made sounds! Excellent for trying parents nuts!
I still have my Cabbage Patch dolls too! 3 in total! Who could resist a doll that was born in a cabbage patch!?
Then after the dolls (before the game systems of course) came the fun stuff...
Remember the Garbage Pail Kids? I had so many stickers & collectors cards! How could you NOT love a face like that!? LOL
The fashion plate kit! I was the best Fashion Designer on the Block!
Though mine wasn't Star Trek I don't know how many hrs I wasted pressing this on newspaper making "copies".
Virtually a large Frisbee with a ball in the center. You stood on the "Frisbee" with the "ball" between your feet & bounce till your hearts content!

Who needed the Icee Man with his truck playing annoyingly loud music when you had Snoopy's Sno-Cone Maker!?
Helping little girls become culinary whizzes! Mom's everywhere cringed when knowing they would have to taste the bland creations that came out of the Easy Bake Oven.

Of course we can't forget all the endless hrs kids spend vegged out in front of the tube...

Who remembers these guys who lived on Fraggle Rock & ate Radishes & Doozer Sticks & always ran from Sprocket?
Oh the little blue guys (& gal)! Living in mushroom houses & always eating smurfberries. Running from their enemy Gargamel.
Every girl loved the cute, cuddly Care Bears with those colorful tatoos on the their tummy's!
That cute little fuzzy alien! Real name Gordon Shumway but nicknamed Alf for Alien Life Form. You can't help but adore a cat eater!

No more cartoons! As I got older I watched more interesting things like...

Mama...That lovely lady who wasn't afraid to say what's on her mind. Played by Vicki Lawrence also known for her role on The Carol Burnett Show.
American Bandstand! Hosted by the famous Dick Clark. I have to admit...I was the best dancer!...In my room!
Remember Harry Stone? The Mel Tormé loving judge! Of course you can't forget Bull...ohh-kay!
What can I say about Larry & his infamous cousin Balky!? Remember the Dance of Joy?

Everyone remembers the catch phrase "What'choo talkin' 'bout, Willis?" said by Arnold who was played by Gary Coleman.
Head of the class! Teacher Charlie Moore played by Howard Hesseman who was better known for his role on WKRP.
Mork & Mindy! Mork played by funny man Robin Williams sporting his rainbow suspenders. Na-Nu Na-Nu!
Hi, I'm Larry, this is my brother Darryl, and this is my other brother Darryl.

As if sitting in front of the TV for hrs rotting your brain isn't bad enough you can't forget about all those 80's flicks...

Goooooooood morning Vietnam! It's 0600 hours. What does the "O" stand for? O my God, it's early!
Hey, hey! What's this I see? I thought this was a party. LET'S DANCE!
Don't worry, Mr. Simms. I look weird, but otherwise I'm real normal. Everything'll be cool.
I just passed another Kojak with a Kodak, this place is crawling with bears, where the hell are you?

Remember how you said your parents use you to get back at each other? Wouldn't I be OUTSTANDING in that capacity?
This is my age! I'm in the prime of my youth, and I'll only be young once!
Yeah, but you're gonna be stupid for the rest of your life.

No! No! I want an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle. You'll shoot your eye out, kid.
Sorry Johnny, I don't have a dime.
Didn't ask for a dime. Two dollars. I want my two dollars!

Remembering those hard rockin, tight pants wearing, infamous big hair bands...

Your Momma don't dance & your Daddy don't rock-n-roll...
You shook me all night long, Yeah you shook me all night long...
You know it's true, Everything I do - I do it for you...
B-B-B-B-Bad B-B-B-B-Bad B-B-B-B-Bad Bad to the bone...